Emotional Intelligence

Daniel Goleman popularized the concept of Emotional Intelligence by his book “Emotional Intelligence”.  What distinguishes human beings from animals is that we are supposed to be aware of our emotions and control them according to our needs as well as the needs of those with whom we interact. A person who can do this will be successful professionally and in personal life.

Definition of Emotional Intelligence

The capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships. Emotional intelligence describes abilities distinct from, but complementary to, academic intelligence.”  - Daniel Goleman (1998)

IQ v/s EQ (Intelligence Quotient v/s Emotional Quotient)

Research shows that IQ can help you to be successful to the extent of  20 percent only in life.  The rest of  80 percent success depends on your EQ. This is because IQ helps in getting an entry into a job, but continued success depends on how well the employee networks and displays networking skills and social relationship skills as these have a direct bearing on leadership styles.

Significance of Emotional Intelligence in an interview

All the candidates who appear for an interview have almost similar IQ as all of them have similar educational background and has passed the aptitude tests which basically measure IQ. Interview is a time to distinguish between those with high EQ and those who do not have that. Smooth working in teams in companies requires the employees to be able to understand their own emotions and control them and also understand others’ emotions and relate to others in a compatible manner. You will have to provide examples to show your high emotional quotient as there will not be any tests to showcase that. Learn all about emotional intelligence and have your examples ready.

You can learn about emotional intelligence by watching this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Qv0o1oh9f4

Attitude

Interviewer will check your attitude towards work as well as life. If you come across as someone who always complains and finds problems with things, you are likely to be rejected. So be very careful when you answer questions.

Some candidates show their dislike for certain things without knowing that they are falling into a trap. For example, if you say you do not like programming and if the interview is for programming job then no one from such companies will select you. It is possible that you did not mean it that way. But busy interviewers do not have time to dig deeper as they have many candidates to interview and finish. One small inadvertent mistake means you are out – for a silly reason.

To succeed in corporates we need knowledge, skill and attitude. Knowledge deals with what to do – the functional and domain knowledge of things to do. Skills comprise of the application of knowledge – be it on a computer or dealing with people. But these two by themselves will not be enough for success. You as an employee must have the attitude to apply and knowledge so that you are motivated to get the best out of you. Sometimes you may not have the best of teams working with you, or the best of supervisors looking after your role. It is easy to get disheartened and demotivated. But that would be a loss for you as your success. That is why interviewer checks for your attitude in interview and there are no written tests for that.

Attitude is not hereditary. It is shaped by our pass experience, education and environment. Whatever be the past, you must now take measures to change the attitude. Start practising the notion that life is not what happens to us, but what we make out of it. Do not get easily angry or sad. When something happens to you, pause for a second and determine the best course of action. Feeling low and sad about someone else’s negative behaviour towards you will affect your energy and productivity. Instead, ask the person why he/she is behaving in that manner and try and solve the issue.

So, do not be upset or irritated or show your frustration during the interview. Do not give any answer which can be considered as reflecting a bad attitude. Be pleasant and full of energy during the interview.

Responsibility

Interview is a time when you can demonstrate that you are a very responsible person.  Have examples of responsibilities that you have undertaken and carried them out to success.  Every company needs employees who are self motivated to be responsible. Blame mentality does not work.

If we have been brought up in an environment where we can blame others for failure, we may continue the same in corporate, but it will not be appreciated. We must be independent and not blame others when things do not go right. Remember what our mothers do when we children bang their head by mistake against a wall and hurt ourselves and cry? All mothers have a sure shot method of stopping children from crying when that happens. They bang the wall and blame it for causing hurt and children immediately keep quiet thinking that the wall was to be blamed. Problem arises when we continue this attitude of blaming others whenever things go wrong once we reach adulthood and start working. Then such blaming is considered as passing the buck.

You will not be considered as a responsible person if at every failure you give excuses and pass the blame to others. Winners do not give excuses, they give solutions.  When you act in a responsible manner, you do not blame others when things do not work out successfully at the end. You would have anticipated the problems and taken the right measures in advance.

Remain an optimist - come what may

Interviews happen because companies have to short list people suitable for their companies. So it is but obvious that some of the candidates interviewed will not make it in the very first interview they attend and there would be further interviews by other companies and finally one gets the job. It is very easy to get disheartened initially. When we see our friends getting the job and we getting rejected, it can be very painful. I have experienced it myself and I can empathize with those who do not make it initially. But to be pessimistic is not the right thing to do. Pessimism and negative thinking will ensure that you come across as an unsuitable candidate in the next interview and your chances further go down. Be optimistic till the end. Remember that if you have not got that job, something better is in store for you.

JK Rowling, the author of Harry Potter series was a single mother living on government grants to look after her family. Desperately poor, she went to ten publishers to publish her first Harry Potter novel, but all of them rejected the novel outright. It was the eleventh publisher who took the risk and that became a best seller. She wrote six more novels and all of them became best sellers and all of them have been made into movies and today is the richest author in the whole world.

Similarly, first seventeen of Abhishek Bachhan’s movies flopped at the box office and only the eighteenth became a hit. If he had given up earlier, he would not have had the chance of succeeding at all. His father Amitabh was rejected when he went for  his first  audition as being too tall and having a funny  voice. That height and baritone voice are his specialities now and he has even patented it recently so that others do not mimic his voice and misuse it.

So never give up. Initial hurdles will come. Otherwise there was no need for an interview.

After every interview, write a journal and write what questions were asked and what your answers were. Discuss among your well wishers and experts and see if that answer could have been better. See where you lack and sharpen your skills for the next interview. Face it without any stress.  Stress will make you forget what you know. Before the interview put on a smiling face for 15 minutes. If you cannot smile take a pen and bite it between your teeth and that position is similar to that of smile and your endocrine system will secrete dopamine – the feel happy chemicals and you will start to relax. Remember that creative thoughts come to your brain only when the brain is relaxed.

Enjoy this nice video – it will motivate you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_OCmWEEkcQ&feature=related

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